With northern Germany now having to deal with an unseasonably warm spring, it’s time to take a last look back at the unseasonably snowy winter that it just endured.
And when it comes to winter, a personal pet peeve of mine is people who don’t clear their cars of snow and ice properly. (Sounds unusually law-abiding (ordnungsgemäß) for me, I know, but it’s these scattered bourgeois ticks of mine that let me enter Germany in the first place.) I just don’t get it. Apart from it being dangerous, it’s not that much work. You could sit freezing in your car doing nothing or you could stand freezing outside doing a little bit of work to keep that little bit warmer. And, let’s be honest, given that it never gets colder than -10 ºC around here, how cold are you really going to get?
Fortunately, German authorities agree with me and driving with obstructed vision is outlawed according to § 23(1) of the federal Roadtrafficordinance (Straßenverkehrsordnung (StVO)). So if the cops catch you with an icy windshield, you’re out a cool 10 EUR, with gusts up to 25 EUR for the even more dangerous snow on the roof. And, if they catch you after you caused an accident because of that windshield, the fine increases super-exponentially to a whopping 35 EUR.
It’s almost as if they’re daring you to break the law, right? The reality, however, is that they are actually encouraging you to do it because § 30(1) StVO also specifically prohibits unnecessary noise and exhaust emissions. So what counts as necessary emissions in a wintery context? Practically speaking, it seems to be the time that you need to clear the outside of the car. Fair enough. But, the real problem here in Not-Bielefeld is the inside of the windshield. Because of the high humidity in winter, the inside is usually iced up just as solidly as the outside and the slightly concave inner surface of the windshield together with the general lack of room make it impossible to scrape clean. Instead, you have to wait for the cold engine to get warm enough to de-ice it for you. All of which could cost you 80 EUR for the unnecessary noise and emissions.
Except for the accident part of it, all this is probably difficult to enforce, with the cops having to be at just the right place at just the right time and in just the right surly mood. Much less difficult to enforce is my second pet peeve of winter: homeowners who feel that road salt is a better solution against snow than a shovel. Apart from the laziness factor, road salt is also a killer for the environment as well as the paws of my dog. And why should I have to buy booties for her (which she hates) because of your first-world problem? Make a one-time investment in a shovel and we’ll both save some money while enjoying our exercise.
Again, the government is completely with me on this, with the city of Not-Bielefeld stipulating that road salt is only to be used, and then in small amounts only, in extreme weather conditions and then only on particularly dangerous areas like steps or other steep inclines. (Steep inclines? What are they talking about? This is northern Germany. The only reason this place has any sort of third dimension at all is by virtue of the curvature of the Earth.) Otherwise, plain ol’ grit is the order of the day, both with regards to the shovelling as well as to what you should scatter on the sidewalks afterwards. Nevertheless, everyone in the city chucks road salt around like it’s Margarita Monday or Tequila Tuesday for even the lightest dusting of snow on the flattest of sidewalks. Hell, I’ve even seen people do it proactively in case it might snow.
(That being said, I can understand this behaviour given the unflinching timetable of the city of Not-Bielefeld when it comes to snow removal: sidewalks have to be cleared by seven in the morning on weekdays, eight on Saturdays, and nine on Sundays and holidays. And then again by eight in the evening should it continue snowing during the day. (By contrast, the city bylaw where I grew up in Canada gave you a more realistic 24 hours after the last snowfall to clear away the snow.))
But unless there’s an official complaint, the city turns a blind eye to it all. And why not? Everyone else is taking the easy way out already too.
The Blog About Fog 